Here is something I found interesting, from BabyCenter. Especially, since it is all about "Pinkie" at my house.
Is it normal that my preschooler wants only things of a certain color, like red foods, red clothes, and red crayon?
Yes. Although it can be difficult to live with, your child's hyper-rigidity — in this case, about color — is an entirely normal developmental phase. In fact, it's a coping technique that children use to gain some control in a big, confusing world.
"There are lots of new things coming at young kids all the time. They're trying as best as they can to make sense of it all," says Harvey Karp, an assistant professor of pediatrics at the UCLA School of Medicine and author of The Happiest Toddler on the Block.
This often leads children to create inflexible "rules for living" that don't make sense to us adults. Parents usually start seeing this behavior between 18 and 24 months, and it becomes strongest between the ages of 2 and 3 (although for some exacting children, it can last quite a bit longer).
To understand it better, Karp suggests that you imagine suddenly waking up in Tokyo. You might become a bit rigid yourself. For example, you'd probably walk the exact same route every day. Similarly, toddlers and preschoolers take the same "path" over and over.
Unfortunately, a 2-year-old's "rules" often aren't practical. While drawing with only red crayons is no big deal, a red-food-only diet would lack nutrition — ketchup and red licorice anyone? But, as every parent knows, when a 2-year-old can't have things exactly the way she wants them, major meltdowns can ensue.
How to handle this? The first step, says Karp, is to show your child that you understand and respect her situation. Using simple, repetitive language, describe your child's inner reality. Karp calls this "Toddlerese." For example, "You're saying no, no, no, no green food, only red food."
Put some emotion in your voice to show your child that you're taking her seriously. But don't try to match her level of distress — this would actually steal her thunder, leaving her feeling robbed. According to Karp, your voice should reflect "more emotion than your baseline but be a few notches below your child's."
As your child feels understood, she'll gradually become calmer and more open to explanation and suggestions. At this point, you could suggest that although the rice is brown, perhaps she could eat it out of her red bowl. Or maybe she'd accept the rice with some small chunks of red strawberries mixed in.
If your child still resists, you'll have to decide whether to give in or to stand firm.
And don't worry, this rigidity won't last forever. As your child's brain matures, she'll become more flexible. She'll see that there are all kinds of ways to get around Tokyo — and she might even try a few different routes.
"There are lots of new things coming at young kids all the time. They're trying as best as they can to make sense of it all," says Harvey Karp, an assistant professor of pediatrics at the UCLA School of Medicine and author of The Happiest Toddler on the Block.
This often leads children to create inflexible "rules for living" that don't make sense to us adults. Parents usually start seeing this behavior between 18 and 24 months, and it becomes strongest between the ages of 2 and 3 (although for some exacting children, it can last quite a bit longer).
To understand it better, Karp suggests that you imagine suddenly waking up in Tokyo. You might become a bit rigid yourself. For example, you'd probably walk the exact same route every day. Similarly, toddlers and preschoolers take the same "path" over and over.
Unfortunately, a 2-year-old's "rules" often aren't practical. While drawing with only red crayons is no big deal, a red-food-only diet would lack nutrition — ketchup and red licorice anyone? But, as every parent knows, when a 2-year-old can't have things exactly the way she wants them, major meltdowns can ensue.
How to handle this? The first step, says Karp, is to show your child that you understand and respect her situation. Using simple, repetitive language, describe your child's inner reality. Karp calls this "Toddlerese." For example, "You're saying no, no, no, no green food, only red food."
Put some emotion in your voice to show your child that you're taking her seriously. But don't try to match her level of distress — this would actually steal her thunder, leaving her feeling robbed. According to Karp, your voice should reflect "more emotion than your baseline but be a few notches below your child's."
As your child feels understood, she'll gradually become calmer and more open to explanation and suggestions. At this point, you could suggest that although the rice is brown, perhaps she could eat it out of her red bowl. Or maybe she'd accept the rice with some small chunks of red strawberries mixed in.
If your child still resists, you'll have to decide whether to give in or to stand firm.
And don't worry, this rigidity won't last forever. As your child's brain matures, she'll become more flexible. She'll see that there are all kinds of ways to get around Tokyo — and she might even try a few different routes.
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